Three Weeks Down, Twenty or so Years to Go

I'm looking at baby pictures of Mud Pie - she is so beautiful. And crazy St. Nick. Can I freeze these kids now? Can I hold on to them at this moment in time and never forget the little details - the terror of the first thunderstorm, the awe of swimming goggles, the fun of a wading pool and a hose?

This is what I wanted. It really is. I didn't want what we had last year: harried race to school to drop off St. Nick, frenzied hours at home batting Little Fish away so I could quick get some things done, race back, hurry through lunch, off to naps, up to get Dr. D from work, back for dinner, errands, bed. I lost precious time with St. Nick - with all of them, really. Mud Pie's first year is lost to me. A blur of car rides, papers to sign, field trips, obligations.

Our home is family now. Do I have more work to do? Less down time? (No down time.) A harder task of juggling home, husband, kids, writing? Yes. But I also know more. I know what crafts St. Nick enjoys most and what books get his imagination going. I get to see it. I don't have to wait for a Progress Report - a stranger's assessment of my child - who is, to her, a stranger as well. I know him, and after three weeks of homeschooling, I know him better than I did three weeks ago.

Am I in this for the long haul? You better believe it.